This morning I was going out shopping, dressed in summery patterned trousers, suede ankle boots, and an oversized, hooded (and rather scruffy) sweatshirt belonging to my husband. He said to me, "You look as though you're on the way home from Glastonbury". It occurred to me that perhaps, mentally, I am always on the way home from Glastonbury - the Glastonbury of 20 years ago, anyway (older person getting sniffy about how such events aren't what they used to be!).
On the way home from Glastonbury, 1993!
Anyway, I was thinking, on the way to Morrissons, not only about how we dress to express our personalities in a conscious way, but also how we tend towards different styles, as a subconscious thing. A few years back I worked for a woman who was younger than me but much more 'straight' (please note: I am not talking about sexual orientation here!! - I mean that her idea of a fun night out was probably a Celine Dion concert) and I remember her asking me if I would ever get my hair cut.
"Why don't you have it cut into a nice bob?" asked she, to which I replied, "Because I'm not a 'nice bob' sort of person."
Not a 'nice bob' sort of person ~ 1990
Which kinda summed it up, really. I always found office clothes difficult, which is because I am not one of nature's admin workers. Couldn't do that neat skirt, tights and shoes bit. It was easiest when I was just given a uniform, like for the Nationwide Building Society - I love jobs with uniforms, you don't have to think about what to wear each morning! I used to find that my work clothes were too 'square' (lovely old-fashioned phrase!) for my normal wear. I felt almost restricted by them, in the same way as I did the daft office rules. I think the preferences of your younger days stay with you, too. I wouldn't wear it these days because I think it would make me look like Bet Lynch, but I always find myself edging towards the leopard print - I try to keep it just for things like make-up bags now, though! Though my husband is not in the first flush of youth by any means, I am instructed, when buying clothes for him, to ask myself this question before I make a purchase: Would Liam Gallagher wear it? If the answer is "you gotta be kidding", I must leave it in the shop.
When I was at the height of my rock chickery I always wore short skirts, suede boots, denim, leopard print, huge belts, etc; but I didn't think I frequently go to The Town & Country Club to see Thunder, thus I must dress like a rock groupie - I just did. I don't anymore; I've moved gradually into the slightly boho-chic look, though not always with a great deal of chic, it has to be said. It wasn't a conscious decision but, of late, my eye tends to be caught by patterned trousers, floaty tops, odd jacket-ish-shrug-ish-waistcoat-ish garments, and the odd scarf! I try to resist the scarf thing a bit, though - have you noticed how writers always wear them, artfully draped?! I don't want to look like a middle-aged writer, I really don't. I draw the line at witty earrings, too.
Me and my pal Lesley, 2012.
We may be in the autumn of our lives but we spit on colour co-ordinating separates!!
My sister, who is much more conservative in outlook than me, usually dresses like a smart city office worker. Okay, she can do 'bag lady' as well as I can, when at home, and can still be seen in an Aerosmith t-shirt if you catch her early enough on a weekend morning, but her well cut dresses and classic tops express how she is, I suppose! How anyone can be bothered to wear posh dresses when they don't have to is beyond me, but we're all different! She wore lycra mini skirts and and over the knee boots twenty-odd years ago, too (Julia, remember the black stetson?) but we've just moved in different ways.
Jools in one of her many smart frocks!
Often, though, people use the way they look as their identity, don't they? The uniform of the punk, or the biker - or, one that always makes me laugh, the new age traveller types who want to be so 'individual' but actually wear as much of a uniform as the conservative city gent - the dreadlocks, the facial piercing, the tie-dyed trousers, the ex-army jacket.
As instantly recognisable as the stockbroker in his designer suit...! People who really are individual don't need a wacky hairstyle to prove it (that's a quote from a character in one of my books!).
For the lacking in confidence, assuming a certain mode of dress can given you an 'in' into a certain club, too - think geeky oddball blokes wearing heavy metal band t-shirts, for instance!! Um.......
Wayne and Garth... or is it???!!
Last of all, I give you the truly insecure ~ the fashion victim who spends £800 on a handbag because it's 'the thing to have'... because that handbag is not a handbag at all. It's a placard saying "I am not only at the cutting edge of what is hot, I also have enough disposable income to buy it. Thus, I am better than you". They don't realise that on the back of the placard it says "I am desperate for approval and admiration."
Not quite sure where else I am going with any of this, huge subject that could be a much longer article - I'd love to hear about your own clothing preferences and any general opinions on this!
You have NO idea how much I was hoping for the Wayne and Garth pic as I scrolled down! I love you!
ReplyDeleteSadly, I've never been a fashion victim and am still a jeans and boots type person. (I was going to say 'girl' but are we allowed to when we're in our 50s?) I digress. I agree with the uniform idea. I get office wear terribly wrong and always resort to black trousers and whatever else is clean otherwise. I still have lots of waistcoats and scarves, I can't bring myself to get rid of them.
As time goes on, I'm very conscious of being 'mutton dressed as lamb' but my daughter assures me that me in jeans is just normal. I don't do dresses. I own 3, all black and all were worn for weddings; my own, my mother in laws and my daughters. I only have 10 pairs of shoes (that includes flip flops and trainers) and I hate shopping with a passion.
You comments re: the biker made me snigger. My husband (15 years younger than me) is a biker. He likes to think he stands out from the crowd which he does when he's not with his biker chums but to the rest of us, he looks like a typical biker....sleeveless t-shirts, leather waistcoat, DMs....
I know what you mean, I'm not half as interested in clothes as many women, and my office clothes used to mostly be black trousers and some sort of okay top, too! Gemma's right, jeans is normal, for all ages. I don't do dressed either, and am proud to say I don't even own one! I quite like shopping but only when I happen to see things I like, and I love shopping for boots and shoes, but having to find a particular outfit for, say, a wedding always ends in tears!!!
ReplyDeleteha ha ha re the biker bit!!!!! And yes - Wayne and Garth were an afterthought, one I couldn't resist!! :)
Terry, I have never been interested in clothes, and as a student I used to buy most of my stuff from charity shops (I'm older than you, so I was a real seventies hippy :-)). My clothes taste has never really changed though. I'm a plain and simple soul when it comes to what I wear. Mostly it's jeans, long sleeve Tee's and little cardies in the winter. Jeans, sleeveless tees and same cardies in the summer…imaginative huh? But…my weakness is boots and shoes (yes, me too) and earrings. I have loads of earrings, but all of the celtic, silver (still hippy) variety. Oh and I do like scarves, but small ones knotted round my neck as opposed to draped ones and I roll out my old waistcoats now and then too (like the one in my profile pic - I think it's twenty years old or more!). I'm like Erinaceus here. I loathe shopping and only dive into shops when I'm desperate for something or everything I have has developed holes..haha!
ReplyDeletePS, I think you look great as a not 'a nice bob' sort of person, and I love the rock chick look!
ReplyDeleteNo that much older, I was a teenager in the 70s, too - I'm in my 30s in the 90s pics on here! (Okay, I was born in 1959 - let's not be coy!). I too used to buy old men's waistcoats from charity shops, etc!!! And grandad shirts to go with them...
DeleteI do know what you mean about the 'still hippy' thing - I still do veer towards that sort of stuff, always look at the celtic silver jewellery on markets, etc. I suppose the 'boho chic' look is but an updated version of that. I notice that of all the friends I hung around with in the 70s, some have stuck firmly with the 'I always wear jeans and boots' thing, and others (usually the ones like me who are a little larger in the stomach these days!) have gone more 'arty' looking!!! :)
Yes, my employer's outlook on most things was as uninteresting as her hairdo, I have to say :)
Well if you're just four years younger than I am, you look AMAZING! I thought you were much younger! There's no way any photo is now going to disguise my wrinkles and wobbly chin whichever angle it's taken from :-D Mind you I remember a friend making fun of my crows' feet when I was in my twenties, so I didn't stand a chance….My daughters are lovely, they call them my laughter lines, but the fact remains...
DeleteObviously I only choose more flattering photos for social networking sites, ha ha!!! Sister and I (she is 56) always reckon that if people could see us with all hair scraped back, no make-up and under harsh light, they would think we were OLDER than we are!!! But I put down to choosing the right parents (!!) - my brother is nearly 50 and looks 30. It's a lot to do with having a girly face, though - and I've moisturised like a bitch since I was about 12!! Having said that, I started to go grey in my 20s and have baggy upper arms, middle-aged spread (ie, eating too much and not exercising enough!) and all the rest of it - it's only my face that's stayed quite young looking.
DeleteLoving the Bonnie Tyler look, I look back at my photographs and think yes I have been a fashion victim, from my first set of maxi boots back in the 70's (yet were fur lined present from Nanna so had to be practical LOL) to catsuits, maxi skirts, permed hair of the 80's. During the 80's very much power dressing even though wearing uniform for work, outside work shoulder pads pencil skirts, always envied the person who could dress casually and still look smart, I do wear jeans and trouser more and more now, gone are the dresses and skirts along with the figure to go with them. Does my dress sense reflect my personality, to a certain extent, I love colours, patterned tops, have a passion for Colbert blue and lilac/purple, even enjoy the splash of a vivid red, avoid browns moss greens greys etc. So maybe my choices do reflect who I am.
ReplyDeleteI think they do without us realising, it, Jane! That was good to read - you must have some good pictures! Oh, and I had platform boots in 1975, too, with a wedge!!!! And I wore those jumpsuits in in the 80s!
DeleteI'm with you on the figure thing - mine's totally gone to crap since the menopause. I mostly wear trousers/leggings/things like leggings but denim or cord, with long-ish tops these days - stomach is AWFUL! And, look up to the pic of me and my friend Lesley taken in 2012 - I always try to get photos with me standing like that, or similar!!!!!
I love this post Terry. I always worry that I'm mutton dressed as lamb because I'm still drawn to the same clothes of my youth. I can't resist Doc Martins, I literally get a spring in my step the very moment I spy a pair. Also I find that I basically buy the same thing over and over again - my wardrobe is stuffed full of grey and black cardigans and black dresses (not the sexy ones I hasten to had, the loose fitting style that cover lumps and bumps.)
ReplyDeleteHa ha! Yes, I think I still wear much the same as did in my youth, aside from the things I can't wear because of my horrible middle-aged-not-enough-exercise-too-much-ice-cream middle area!!! Today, I am in a large t-shirt, leggings and flat suede boots with buckles on the sides.... I've managed to move away from everything-in-black - but yes, I still wear short black stretchy skirts, though only with leggings and boots, not in the sexy way!!! Never worn Doc Martens, but then I was never a punk :D
ReplyDeleteI haven't been on a shopping spree since I was made redundant but before that it was one of my most favourite things to do and I tried to keep up with the latest fashions. That was over two years ago, and now I live in black leggings, vest tops and tees around the house, (or the very Essex 'onesie'). I call them 'my comfy gear'. Actually that has always been important - I like to feel comfortable in whatever I wear. I like stretchy stuff that makes ironing unnecessary! I can't remember the last time I ironed. I love long tees that just cover my bum, but they have to be clingy or have some shape to them and even better if the neck line is deep enough to show a bit of cleavage! I like to look good when I walk down the street, not because I'm vain, but undoubtedly if I look good I feel good. It also gives me a kick when blokes toot at me when they drive past! It makes the effort of dressing nicely all worthwhile. I love stretchy mini dresses which I wear with black leggings and heels or flats. I rarely expose my legs these days, therefore, although I do own some lovely smart dresses they rarely get an airing. I like to hang on to my youth so I do keep an eye on evolving fashions and like you I've always looked younger than my age so I can get away with wearing younger (as opposed to young) styles! What I wear defines my mood too. If I wear bright colours (reds / greens look good) I'm definitely having a confident, 'feel good' day, than if I dress in blacks / browns. Nice article Terry - thought provoking! ;) Love all your photos too. You look incredibly young for your age and have gorgeous skin! X
ReplyDeleteNever been a one for keeping up with latest fashions, though obviously one's choices are influenced by them. Yes - it IS because you're vain, and so am I, and there is nothing wrong with it. If it wasn't for a little healthy vanity we'd look like bag ladies, and there is also nothing wrong with wanting the opposite sex to find you attractive; that's one of life's great joys, I think! I'm the opposite from you - my legs/bum are/is my best bit, but my middle bit is horrendous!!!! I think with people like you, me, Julia, E L Lindley, etc, we haven't bowed down to middle age, so we still can wear quite youthful things - hurrah! Good to read your reply! x
DeleteWell, as you know I'm not a fashion victim. I have, however lived through tartan trousers (in my teens - I had about 6 pairs of them), jeans with turn-ups, jeans with no pockets, basically any variation of jeans or trousers. In my early twenties I bought everything out of Next, as having just finished uni, I was delighted to have some money to spend! Then I got fed up as everyone was wearing the same thing, so I started buying my clothes abroad, but not in a 'ooh, I picked this little number up in Paris' kinda way. More, 'I dug this out in Macy's' kinda way! Now, life is all about fitting into the 5 items I possess which fit me post-pregnancy and which the wee one hasn't seen fit to throw up over - so fashion for me amounts to wearing something which is clean! Ooh and trainers, always trainers. And I do like nice bags, but they have to be gifts and not cost £800! Scarves?! I once received a Salvatore Ferragamo scarf as a gift and the colour suited me perfectly, but I am so NOT a scarf kinda girl - I sold it on Ebay about 10 years later, with tags!
ReplyDeleteHave to say your tartain trousers worry me slightly - is it a Scottish thing??!!! I like your attitude to clothes very much :) This post has provoked the longest replies I've ever had on a post - people love talking about the clothes they choose, don't they? And I love reading them :^D
DeleteI love this blog and the replies. One thing I do remember from my mid-teens was West Coast jeans. Did anyone else have them? The wider the better and you had to have lots of pairs because they all had different designs stitched into the back pocket *sighs* Life was so much simpler then :-)
ReplyDeleteNo, don't remember them - in my teens I think I had Falmers, Inega, Lois.... lots of people had Wranglers. MY best friend's sister and her chap owned a big jeans shop which also sold in Sounds (before internet, ha ha!!), so jeans make was always quite a big thing. Having said that, I was down south, so perhaps West Coast was an up north thing? Ah - also am older than you, so my mid-teens was 75-77 :)
DeleteWow, this post has given me food for thought Terry! I'm currently wearing a 'dress' I bought at Glastonbury 1983, a Laura Ashley cardigan from the 90s and a pair of black Spandex leggings I picked up for £3.75 in the Sock Shop on-line sale! I have to point out that I didn't actually realise the leggings were Spandex when I ordered them...I had on the wrong glasses...but I love them.
ReplyDeleteSoo x
Soo, your get up sounds very moi!!!! And spandex happens to be very comfortable! I want to see the 30 years ago Glastonbury dress!!!
DeleteI wear what is comfortable, and suits my body. Mostly jeans and cotton tops, short sleeved, long sleeved, heavy, light, depending on the weather. Always wear boots, bike boots (cause they are soo comfy) or 'Sha-Booties' (Shoe-like Ankle Boots with a heel. Although I have been riding a Harley for 25 years, I rarely ever wear black, and only wear my leathers when actually riding, as they do protect and cut down wind. My leather riding pants are brown, but I have only found leather riding jackets in black. Most people do not believe I ride, as I think the bike shop forgot to give me 'THE MANUAL' on HOW TO Look, Dress, Talk & Walk, Now That You Own A Harley...' Comes in handy at bike runs, shows, etc., as my friends can always find me in a sea of black T-Shirts. I am the ONE wearing light blue or emerald green. As for 'Designer Duds' I am NOT paying to advertise some Designers name or ego. My favourite and most comfy jeans were bought at Walmart for $9!!! I should have bought three more pairs at the same time.
ReplyDeleteForgot to add, you look great in all your pics! You are def NOT a 'bob' type of woman! Thankfully! You look amazing with long hair. So sad when women cut their hair for 'fashion reasons' and it does not suit them.
ReplyDeleteLove your comments, Karena - I love those 'sha-bootie' things, just wish I could still wear stuff like that! Bad arthritis in knee, can't take heels anymore. Yeah - I think most women look best with long hair. Most people,full stop, really!
DeleteDid you watch Fabulous Fashionistas last night (wed 17th) on C4? Takes this to a whole nother dimension......ladies in their 70s and 80s wearing what they want,being who they want to be and ignoring the stares and comments. Oh yes!
ReplyDeleteNo, I nevah, CJ. I feel I might want to watch it on catch up, though... I'm all for wearing what the hell you want, it's up to the individual if they want to make themselves look daft or not, indeed....!!!
DeleteBoho chic - oh yes, I'm with you on that one. I think we may have been fashion sisters in the past. I too loved work uniforms. Hurrah, no thinking. Work clothes way too square and I used to (actually still do) tell my hairdresser to make my hair look, 'not too neat'. They never can get that one though, can they. Great post. Enjoyed it :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Della - you're right, I feel we are kindred spirits! Happily, my hairdresser is only 30 and has waist-length hair, she says if she has more than half an inch cut off it at any one time she feels bald, so totally gets me. My hair is a natural lion's mane, I think; I couldn't make it neat if I tried!!!
DeleteIn that 1990 photo, you look like a young Bonnie Tyler, Terry! I know I've already said you look like a young Stevie Nicks now... I've clearly got a habit about comparing folk to famous people! Nice post x
ReplyDeleteHa ha! Funnily enough, in another post of mine (The Liebster Blog award, posted in about March), I was asked which famous person I was told I looked like, and I answered Bonnie Tyler - about 15 years ago I was working in this pub, and you know how bar staff have those key things they have to log in with, which show their name? The landlord changed mine to 'Bonnie' because that was what all the chaps called me! Oh, and I have that habit too - comparing people to famous ones!!!!
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