Tuesday, 21 August 2012
Things that make me go GRRRRR
I don't experience learning curves, I just learn things.
I don't pop across to the dentist's chair, your blogsite, the checkout, or indeed anywhere else - I just go there, okay?Similarly, medical people, do not just pop the needle into my arm, or ask me to just pop my clothes off, right?
Neither do I simply pop things into the oven, despite the instructions on the back of various foodstuffs. The words 'put' and 'take' are fine; we don't have to be all pseudo-chummy about this.
When I have any experience that lasts a while, or decide to do something new, I am not going on a journey, unless I am, during this time, for instance, catching the number 27 to Morrissons.
I have changes in my life, but they are not necessarily sea changes.
I may be pleased about something, but I most certainly do not *do a happy dance* or, if triumphant, *do a victory dance*
I make guesses or estimates, I do not make guestimates.
When I worked as the Accounts person in an engineering firm, I was not a number cruncher.
Can't I want all my book covers to look similar without creating a brand?
I imagine all teachers make a difference every day of their lives, they don't have to make a song and dance about it.
I prefer to get together and discuss things with people, rather than touch base.
That stuff around my waist is not curves, it's fat.
I can really love doing something, get very enthusiastic about it - obsessed for a while, even - but I haven't suddenly started to describe it as 'my passion'
I don't source, gift or growth things, I do not task people to do anything, and I would certainly never birth or parent. Why not? Because they are nouns, not verbs.
I will never, ever attend a webinar. I might look at an online seminar, though.
I laugh a lot and I am probably slightly unconventional in outlook, but I am not quirky, sassy, kooky, and please strike me down the day I become bubbly.
I will send you a message on Facebook, I will not inbox you.
When I talk about something that used to happen in the past, I will refrain from using the term 'back in the day'.
Anyone who tries to sell me a few olives, nuts and seeds in some crappy container and calls it a graze box is at risk of getting it shoved where the sun etc etc.
I do not have tipples, I have drinks
When I find something particularly enjoyable to eat or drink, I say 'Mmmm', not nom nom nom.
...thank you to Sarah Vogel for reminding me of this one - if I want something in a shop I say "Please can I have", not "can I get...", one of the many things that sound okay when Americans say it, but awful when English people adopt it. Dude.
There are many, many more, and more will be added, unfortunately, as time goes on, and these will be adopted by many, too, alas......